[coffee] cuppa coffee

The taste of drifting.

 I found myself staring at my journal for almost a minute or two. I know I would be writing something about how my day went. Though there are a lot of things that has happened, I realized that I found myself not being able to write a single word. 

Well I did, write a few words but in the end, those words turned into a scratch.

A scratch. 



If I remember it clearly one of my professors in writing told me that there are those people that when they start working, they drift off to their passions and become a slave of their work. Their life revolves around eating, working, having fun with friends, and sleeping. He had noticed this when his daughter who had a passion for writing had started working. 

I remember that when I realized that I no longer don't know what to write about. Why suddenly writing becomes a responsibility that I need to fill rather than a hobby. I looked back at my past entries only to realize that my writings were mostly .... nonsensical and non-reflective. 
They say that when people lived the real life, they had little time for sentimental things. They drift away towards ... the world of apoplexy.
[animation] owl

The Box of Life

I always find myself wondering about my life and exactly where I want it to be. Don't get me wrong, I know what direction I should take. I know what I wanted to be and where I want to be in the next few years; but I don't know what circumstances that life would do to take me or perhaps tempt me to take different way.

But I pray that I wouldn't be derailed from my plans. I hope I'll get to where I really wanted to be. I am hoping that God will guide me and would lead me to a better life. I am positive that He would, if I just keep doing what He wanted me to do: Pay everyone with kindness.

And in doing so, I just need to be patient because everything will come on time. I know and I am sure of it. For now, I will just wonder what He stored for me.
[coffee] cuppa coffee

while in the comfort room.

My work starts 8 PM until 5 AM. So basically, in our floor, our team would be left alone. Every time I take a pee alone, I always imagine that a zombie would be crawling on the floor inside the cubicle. By then, I'll be paranoid and start feeling anxious.

[Brosnan] Suave

a little of everything

hello friends! It's been quite a while since the last time I updated. To summary what had happened in my life in the past few days here are they:

1. In the office my officemates had been teasing me to this guy. I find it a bit annoying because the guy is already married. Being teased to him is a little unnerving... and awkward... and inappropriate.

2. I was really offended when my officemate had carelessly joked that I'll probably mess up with my work. I found it very unethical but I want to take what he said as a challenge. I seriously want him to eat his words. I don't know what made him say that. :s geez, I don't know how could anyone be so ... insensitive.

3. My father got drunk last night and he was saying a lot of awful things to himself and to his father (basically my grandfather). I noticed that my father only gets to release a little of his grief when he's drunk. I feel so bad about him. Anyway there's a lot of issues regarding my father. But I cannot say it all here because it'll be a novel if I did.

4. I am happy, despite everything. hehehe!
[BFF] best friends forever

:( & :D

I learned how dogs love when one day, I was so sad and my dog Pinky went into my room and placed her head on my lap. I did not share how I felt to anyone and it was she who had felt that something was wrong and was the first one to sympathize with me.

We might never spoke the same language but we definitely share our feelings.

.... I miss her but I know she's in the best place right now. <3


Anyway, baaaaah I'm going to skip talking about that because I might eventually weep. HAHAHA! Today, I spent half of my time sleeping, a bit of reading, updating my story, updating my sketch, making finance manager program in Excel, and crocheting. I literally did not leave my room today except when I go to use our bathroom or eat.

My mom knocked on my door and asked me if I was being a *cave woman* again (this had been our joke when I don't go out of my room) and I told her that it's just for today because I am getting behind my works. When she asked me of what I am doing, she laugh a little and told me that I should stop getting a head of my time. I told her that I was actually procrastinating last week and just had the opportunity to work on my stuff today, so I was a bit loaded. But I assure her that I was having fun doing those.

*sigh* But  I thought that she was right. So I just stopped crocheting. After updating this, I might get some goodie-foodie and watch some zombie movie. :] HAHAHA that rhymes.

So how was your weekend? :)
[coffee] cuppa coffee

of what I thought about during 3AM

Two weeks at work.

Sometimes, I wonder about my life and how I wanted it to be. I still have the thought that in the end I can be someone. Someone that had contributed something in this world. For now what I have been contributing is by giving few coins to the unfortunate people, never missing Sunday mass, and patting my pets on the head and telling people at youtube to stop killing Sharks for soups.

But I wanted to do more. I think, and this had been what I thought since I got in college, and still think that we are born because we are born to do something substantial. But that's just me. And I am going to figure what I was born to do until my last breath.

Anyhow what I was also wondering was when I can have my very own house; I am wondering about this because I so want to have my own kitchen already. Our kitchen at home was so lacking that I want to weep. Well it's just that my parents aren't big time food lovers like me so they are satisfied with the usual. But I wanted more. Probably, I need to see a financial adviser soon so I can buy one. hahaha :3

Well that's all for today. I woke up at 3 AM and had this thought.

What are your thoughts?
[blanchett] Hope

jealousy inspires me. lol!

I have been browsing my favorite links and every time I see their new creative stuffs, it never fails to make me jealous. In particular, while I was browsing Mall's blog, I couldn't help but hope that I can do magical stuffs like hers; make my own designed toys and do murals just like hers. Then while I was scanning, I remembered what our priest said earlier. He mentioned that he also gets jealous by those people who can play the piano. He said that he can't be just jealous and admire them forever, so what he did was to take lessons.

In my case, I also believe the same thing. I cannot be just a spectator forever. I cannot let things pass before my eyes. I may not be as good as Mall or any of my favorite artists but it won't definitely stop me from practicing and be better. I may get jealous and envious but it was never a destruction but rather as an inspiration. 

To say, since I was obsessing with handcrafts, arts, and cooking I have been practicing and I know eventually I'll do good. I won't stop until I get there.

just saying. hahaha! :D
[coffee] cuppa coffee

(no subject)

"Is that growing old? Or is it something worse?
You cannot protect yourself from sadness
without protecting yourself from happiness"

Passage from the book:
Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close<
by Jonathan Safran Foer
[coffee] cuppa coffee

Two weeks ago I hanged out with my friends Raisa and Adz. It was also during that time when I gave them my gifts. Instead of just buying random stuff, I thought about giving them something meaningful that would not cost me so much since I am tight on budget. So what I did was to give them a parcel that contained personal letter, flash card of wisdom, and small meaningful totems: dice, and buttons.

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